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Mastering your habits to live out of intention
WHO HAS NEVER DREAMED OF BECOMING A RUNNER, AN EARLY RISER OR A HEALTHY SNACKER ? WELL MAYBE TODAY IS THE DAY !
We've been hearing a lot lately that we need to live more out of intention and less out of habit. And if you take a look at your everyday life, I'm sure you'll find some areas of mindlessness.
To me, living with intention means managing my habits to fit my desires better, and custom build our everyday life. Here are a few ideas to get you started :
This blog post is inspired from the book "the power of habits" by Charles Duhigg. We'll explain some key elements of the book, that helped us change and tweak some of our habit, as well as creating new, more empowered ones ! Here we go -
1. UNDERSTANDING OUR HABITS
According to Charles Duhigg, habits are composed of three elements : cue, routine and reward, or see, do, enjoy. Meaning a habit is triggered by a cue, that can be a feeling, a sight, a smell, a memory etc., is followed by a routine response in the form of an action, and reap a reward.
For example, I feel hungry (cue), I eat something (routine), I feel satisfied and full (reward).
To add intention to our daily life, it is so important to learn to interpret our automatic actions. From that first step, we can begin to invite change.
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2. ADDING INTENTION TO OUR DAY
In order to shift habits, I find it important to first define why we wish them to change. By finding out what drives us to change, we make sure that it sticks, that we can make it last.
To do this, you can sit with a pen and paper and start searching for a realistic and worthy reason for you to change a habit.
Then looking closely at that particular form of habit, we can replace the routine element by one that suits us better.
For example, maybe I have a habit of eating chocolate in the afternoon and I wish to stop (I said maybe..). The reward I get from eating chocolate is a boost of energy and a feeling of satiety. My cues will always be the same in the afternoon, maybe coming from feeling tired, or hungry, or restless and wanting a little chocolate comfort. If I change the routine chocolate by, let's say, cut up fruit and peanut butter, I still get the same reward, which is feeling full and energized, but I stopped eating chocolate.
So instead of simply wishing that I could just stop eating chocolate in the afternoon, I can look at what I get from it, and simply replace it with a healthier alternative.
After some time, with repetition, when you see the cue, you'll start to crave that new healthy snack. The routine starts to stick !
Of course, all bad habits aren't as easy as chocolate.. If you wish to stop smoking for example, or stop being too hard on yourself, if you wish to change the way you speak about or to others, etc., know that the best place to start is always to look at the cause. A lot of the time, we do things without paying it much thought, simply because we've always done it that way, or because it worked for us up until a certain point. By taking a good look at the reward you get from doing certain things, it becomes easier to shift it : you are not going in blind. You can learn to recognize what you need and offer yourself a healthier alternative.
3. CREATING POSITIVE HABITS
Inviting intention in your life doesn't necessarily come with changing something you do, maybe it can be about adding something new you would like to start doing.
You might want to start jogging, or go to sleep earlier. These are what Charles Duhigg calls "key stones". They are the start of a wave of positive repercussions that you invite into your life. Because sleeping more, for example, will help not only with your energy level, but your mood, your imagination, your stress levels, your physical and emotional strength. Adding a key element like better sleep to your life will ripple positively on the rest, giving you a lot of small victories and so many more reasons to keep going.
Just as with changing a bad habit, you can have a look at your motivation to add it to your life, giving yourself a list of reasons why you think you want to try it. It goes hand in hand with the reward. For example, I want to get up earlier in the morning to have more time for myself before the day starts. That sense of space and time just for myself is my reason to get up on time. It is my reward.
Then to make it easier for yourself, you can place cues, to help you remember to add your new habit to your day. If you want to start meditating for example, you can prep your area in the morning or the night before, maybe set an alarm, or place little reminders around you to take deep breaths, to stay present, to ground yourself.
As you take in the cues during the day, you will start craving that sense of space and calm that comes with meditation, and it might just be what you need to take five minutes in silence for yourself.
EVOLVING AND GROWING IS PART OF OUR HUMAN JOURNEY. AND AS WE CHANGE, ALL WE CAN DO IS SUPPORT OURSELVES AND BE PROUD OF THE PROCESS, NOT JUST THE RESULTS !
